Leonardo (10 years old), gifted: everyone sees him as a “genius,” no one sees his struggle

by Stefano Vicari

Giftedness is not in itself a disorder, but it must be recognized in order to provide appropriate stimulation and to help children develop social skills.

Leonardo is ten years old and attends the fifth grade. He reads books meant for much older children, asks questions about space, death, and the origin of numbers. When something interests him, he can talk about it for hours. Adults describe him as “a little genius.” He, however, does not feel that way.

“I don’t want to be a genius. I just want to have friends.”

At school he learns quickly. He finishes exercises before the others, then gets bored. He corrects his classmates, interrupts the teacher, and becomes irritated if an explanation seems inaccurate. He does not do this out of arrogance. In his mind, other people’s mistakes are often almost physically hard to tolerate.

His classmates look for him when they need help with homework, but less when it comes to playing. They see him as strange, too serious, too adult in some things and too fragile in others.

This is one of the most frequent difficulties in gifted children: uneven development. Leonardo can reason about complex topics, but may fall apart if he loses a game. He understands abstract concepts but struggles to tolerate frustration. He has a very rich vocabulary, but does not always manage to follow simple group rules.

The testimony of a mother

Parents come to me worried not about grades, which are excellent, but about his loneliness. Leonardo comes home from school upset; he says his classmates are immature, yet he cries because no one invites him to parties.

“I am different even when I don’t want to be.”

During the assessment, a profile of cognitive giftedness emerges. But giftedness, on its own, is neither a clinical diagnosis nor a guarantee of well-being. It is a form of neurodivergence—a way of functioning that can be a major strength, but also create vulnerabilities if it is not recognized and supported.

For Leonardo, the problem is not knowing too much. It is not knowing where to place everything he knows without losing connection with others.

Working with him does not mean restraining him—that would be a mistake. It means helping him use his abilities without turning them into distance. Learning to wait. Not always correcting others. Tolerating imprecision. Understanding that friendship does not come from superior answers, but from the ability to share an experience.

The school is also involved. Leonardo needs appropriate stimulation, but also opportunities to be part of the group without always feeling out of place. It is not enough to give him harder exercises. He needs support in developing emotional and relational skills.

One day he tells me that during recess he explained something about planets to a classmate. Then he adds, almost surprised: “But afterwards we also played.”

It is a small sentence. But for Leonardo it means a lot: not having to choose between his intelligence and belonging to the group.

The neuropsychiatrist’s commentary

Cognitive giftedness indicates intellectual functioning significantly above average. It is not, in itself, a disorder but a form of neurodivergence. It should not be medicalized. At the same time, it should not be idealized as something that automatically protects against suffering.

Some gifted children and adolescents show a strong gap between cognitive, emotional, and social development. They may have advanced interests, fast thinking, rich language, and great curiosity, but struggle with emotional regulation, peer relationships, and frustration tolerance.

The risk is twofold. On one hand, seeing them only as “high achievers” and failing to notice their difficulties. On the other, interpreting them as arrogant, oppositional, or strange without understanding the unevenness of their development.

Recognizing giftedness means providing appropriate stimulation, but also supporting the child in building social and emotional skills. Intelligence alone is not enough. That intelligence must be helped to find its place in everyday life, at school, and in relationships.

A highly capable child remains a child. And even talent, if left alone, can become a form of isolation.

(Director of Child Neuropsychiatry at the Bambino Gesù Pediatric Hospital in Rome; Professor of Child Neuropsychiatry at the Catholic University of the Sacred Heart; author of “Diversamente intelligenti” (Feltrinelli))

A journey into the world of “gifted” children: who gifted (plusdotati) children really are

The president of Step Net, Viviana Castelli, told Tgcom24: “Perpetually searching for their reference human group, they are driven by extraordinary sensitivity—but don’t call them geniuses.”

A big heart and immense potential yet to be discovered. It sounds like a fairy tale lived by gifted children—and perhaps it truly is one, just as real as the risk that it can turn into a vortex of suffering. Into self-rejection. Into a flattening of needs and life aspirations.

Gifted children: an expert speaks

It is a multifaceted picture that emerges from a long conversation with Viviana Castelli, president and co-founder of Step Net Odv, the national reference association in Italy for supporting gifted children and adolescents (also known as gifted) and their families.

“Don’t call them geniuses”

Let’s immediately dispel a common misconception: we are not talking about geniuses. Viviana does not like the term “genius.” She considers it outdated, poorly representative of the person, and ultimately inadequate.

“What does ‘genius’ even mean?” Viviana begins. “We are talking about people, individuals, often very young and sensitive, for whom evaluating only IQ is limiting. Our philosophy embraces the mind and cognitive abilities, but also the emotional sphere and personality. Research and empirical evidence show that all these components contribute to maintaining a person’s potential.”

Can we outline a profile of a gifted child?

“The right metaphor is to imagine them as a large tree,” Viviana Castelli explains. “A tree with arborescent thinking—both global and analytical. Divergent thinking, capable of finding one or more unusual solutions to problems, even in everyday life. An imaginative, creative mind linked to a predictive capacity that can generate different scenarios for any situation.”

Beautiful, right? Yes—but also very exhausting.

“And precisely for this reason,” the president of Step Net continues, “it is difficult to channel them in a society that sometimes tends toward flattening, wanting to keep everyone at the same level, even in learning, promoting inclusion that inevitably ends up excluding the most brilliant minds and the most marked sensitivities.”

The personalities of gifted children

The personalities of gifted children are extremely complex.

“They are individuals who throughout their lives are searching for their reference human group. They try in every way to find it, showing enormous resilience and adaptability. Unfortunately, this search is one-sided. The peer group often does not recognize them or mocks them. They themselves tend to seek relationships with adults or older peers who can better satisfy their curiosity. In this environment, the social relationships they build are often difficult, and self-esteem does not benefit—in fact, quite the opposite. The key is to help them understand that they are not wrong for being who they are.”

The data

Giftedness is a phenomenon that globally affects about 6% of the population (a figure that includes both high cognitive potential children and gifted children). It should not be confused with a single talent or early development.

“Tests are excellent tools in this regard,” Viviana observes, “because they allow us to base evaluation on clear quantitative data, which must then also be interpreted qualitatively.”

Signs of giftedness

Gifted children are individuals in whom certain characteristics can already be seen from a very early age.

“Generally, during the first year of life, they tend to reach psychomotor milestones earlier,” explains the president of Step Net Odv. “They develop attention early and maintain eye contact. In many cases, early language development can be observed, with well-formed speech already around 18 months. Later on, symbolic play and strategic play appear. As they grow, other signs emerge: for example, a deep curiosity about numbers, reading and writing, and existential concepts (mainly life and death), topics on which they do not accept vague answers. We must also mention their value system, in which a strong sense of justice stands out, along with sensitivity and self-directed learning ability.”

Potential and fragility

These signs are driven mainly by two engines: motivation and passion. Energies that, at school age, risk fading without adequate support. And “support” is indeed the key word in their development path.

Viviana Castelli stresses that there is still a lot of confusion on the topic: signs are often not properly recognized or are confused with learning or behavioral disorders, or too much pressure is placed on performance, causing unnecessary stress.

School: a fluctuating experience

“In the school context, for example, they learn quickly,” Castelli continues, “and they often find themselves waiting for the class to reach the same level, with teachers assuming ‘since they are intelligent, they will understand anyway.’ But that is not the case: waiting is frustrating for gifted children, and without structured activities they may develop inappropriate behaviors. As they grow, lack of support can even lead them to drop out of school. Another misunderstanding is that, despite their high abilities, they cannot always be expected to support classmates. The risk is over-responsibilizing them.”

Adults must understand that these are still children or young people with emotional tools appropriate to their age. They fear mistakes and judgment, often have low self-esteem, and frequently hide behind a “low-profile” persona, conforming to their environment to avoid showing their abilities—or, conversely, acting out to be noticed.

It is therefore not easy for families or schools to manage all this without support and clear guidelines.

Assessment and feedback

“When families come to us, they are often as confused as their children,” she explains. “Through evaluation tests and feedback, we help both the child and the family find balance. We also support the relationship with schools, often helping to develop a personalized learning plan (PDP).”

The change is significant: children who arrive full of doubts leave with the certainty that nothing is wrong with them. From that moment, their personality opens up.

A legal shift underway

At the legislative level, Step Net’s work is part of a crucial moment in Italy, moving from administrative flexibility toward structured legal protection.

On October 7, 2025, the Senate approved in first reading a bill on “Provisions in favor of students with high cognitive potential,” now under review by the Chamber of Deputies. The law aims to officially recognize these students’ needs, introduce mandatory teacher training, and appoint a school reference figure for High Cognitive Potential (APC).

Meanwhile, under Ministerial Decree 1603 (2018), a national technical committee on giftedness was established at the Ministry of Education, and a 2019 ministerial note officially included gifted students among Special Educational Needs (BES), guaranteeing them the right to personalized education.

The value of training

Step Net ODV has also collaborated on a three-year research project with Università Cattolica, published in a special education textbook for future teachers addressing the needs of gifted students and the risk of misdiagnosis. The study highlights the deep sensitivity of these students, often invisible in school or victims of bullying, whose value goes beyond academic performance.

There is also strong commitment to teacher training: the association is building a national network on giftedness and has already trained over 9,000 teachers.

How a gifted person’s mind works – from neurosciences to social context

Giftedness is a concept that is difficult to define, much like intelligence itself. Traditionally, it is defined through the measurement of the intelligence quotient (IQ), which must be higher than 130. However, more modern theories, such as the one developed by psychologist Joseph Renzulli, aim to view the phenomenon in a more holistic way, recognizing the importance—alongside high cognitive abilities—of factors such as creativity and dedication. The focus therefore shifts from simply measuring intelligence to the conditions that allow high cognitive potential to develop and be expressed, through the interaction between individual characteristics and social context, as confirmed by recent research published in the International Journal of Developmental Neuroscience. Indeed, the brains of gifted individuals appear to be “better wired,” showing a more efficient ratio between the difficulty of a problem and the brain resources used. When we think of gifted individuals, we might imagine a Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory: super intelligent, but also (at least initially) socially isolated with few friends. However, giftedness is not necessarily synonymous with success or with isolation: individual personality and social dynamics among peers also play a key role.

More than IQ: the three ingredients of giftedness

We often think that giftedness is only a numerical matter, strictly based on IQ (the famous IQ), which in gifted individuals is considered to be 130 or higher. In reality, the issue is much more complex. We can imagine giftedness as a raw material, a high innate cognitive potential that is not yet expressed. In order for this potential to become “talent”—that is, concrete excellence in a specific field such as mathematics, the arts, or sports—recent research shows that additional but essential ingredients are needed: commitment, motivation, and a supportive socio-cultural environment.

Although traditional intelligence tests remain the most widely used tools to identify these individuals, modern scientific theories, such as Renzulli’s “three-ring” model—one of the most influential in the field—explain that giftedness emerges from the dynamic interaction of several factors: above-average intellectual ability, strong creativity, and high task commitment. We could therefore redefine a gifted person as someone capable of using information in a flexible, original, and critical way. From an early age, these minds show insatiable curiosity, a very large vocabulary for their age, and an extraordinary memory.

Why is the gifted brain so efficient?

Gifted individuals seem to understand concepts with a ease that the average person achieves only with time, effort, and struggle. A very recent study published in the International Journal of Developmental Neuroscience tells us that gifted individuals have a distinctive neural architecture. Let us look at it broadly.

A crucial element of this architecture is the extreme global efficiency of brain connections, particularly the integrity of “white matter,” which consists of bundles of nerve fibers that act as highways of information in the brain. These highways allow extremely fast and efficient signal transmission, combined with a more integrated brain network. This results in lower energy consumption when solving simple or low-demand tasks, but in rapid, strong, and precise activation when challenges become difficult and complex.

The brains of gifted individuals also appear to have more efficient and faster communication between neurons and better adaptability. Structurally, these brains show variations in the thickness of the cerebral cortex, features linked to strong neuroplasticity—that is, an exceptional ability of the brain to reshape and refine its circuits based on experience. As a result, these individuals tend to have shorter reaction times, strong ability to maintain focused attention, and above-average working memory.

Between myth and reality: advantages and challenges of giftedness

There are two opposing myths about giftedness. The first is the widespread belief that these individuals are guaranteed success and do not need any educational support. The second, equally common but opposite, is that gifted individuals are inevitably destined for isolation and emotional distress due to being “ahead” of others.

A scientific study published in the Journal for the Education of the Gifted brings us back to a balanced view and the uniqueness of each individual life. High intelligence is not necessarily linked to emotional disorders or social difficulties; in fact, in many cases exceptional cognitive potential acts as a protective factor, helping young people adapt and showing levels of stress, anxiety, or depression equal to or even lower than those of their peers. On the other hand, another study published in Exceptional Children suggests that, despite mixed findings, gifted students may experience slightly higher levels of perceived loneliness compared to typically developing peers.

Let us explore this further. Gifted students are not a homogeneous group, and the risk of isolation depends on several factors. First, cognitive level matters: the higher the IQ, the wider the gap with peers, making it harder to find a suitable and stimulating social environment. In addition, personality plays a crucial role: traits such as introversion, emotional instability, or low cooperation increase feelings of loneliness, just as they would in anyone else. Finally, peer dynamics also make a difference, with clear gender distinctions: in general, gifted girls seem to suffer more than boys, especially if they are rejected or not accepted by the group, while boys tend to experience deeper distress when they become targets of bullying and victimization, as they are less likely to seek support.

Just like typically developing individuals, gifted people also need more than intellectual ability to thrive in a healthy way: they need fulfilling relationships, real friendships, and an environment capable of promoting acceptance and breaking down barriers of loneliness.